Wednesday, March 27, 2013
Quieting your inner voice
Sometimes, quieting your inner voice (when it is being a critic) can be a very good thing. Learning to drown out your own negative thoughts about yourself is essential. But, sometimes, when you have silenced the voice inside of you that wants to stand up for yourself or to let "you" be heard then you have a problem. I have a problem.
Rewind about ten years or so ago and I was the girl who would freely and happily give you my opinion on any matter. Really. You ask , I will tell you. Now, I don't mean to say that I was rude, condescending or righteous about it. Not at all. More that I wasn't AFRAID to state my opinion.
Now, as I got older I realized the value of sometimes keeping my mouth shut. We all aren't going to agree and that is okay. It really is. I have said it before and I will say it again, just as much as I believe in something, someone may just as fervently believe the opposite. That is okay. We can respect one another and respect the fact that we have the right to even have differing opinions.
But, somewhere along the way of always trying to keep the peace and not rock the boat I have lost the ability to stand up for my opinion at all! This is no ones fault but my own. No, I don't need to go shouting it from the rooftops, but I also don't need to let fear of the "fall out" bother me either. I am a little stunned to think that fear governs so many of my decisions these day. It shouldn't and I can not allow it to anymore.
So, in short, what I am trying to say is that I need to sometimes be more vocal about my thoughts and feelings, especially when people question some of the things that I hold the most dear.
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Finding a good balance is hard!
ReplyDeletei can relate so much to this post, ashley! i a lot of times try and keep the peace. i've learned over the years that some people can just absolutely not be in my life. and i've learned that it was the healthiest thing to let go. but sometimes, i realize that i can still voice my opinion (especially when i am being hurt or manipulated) by someone. i'm sending love and wishing you peace with this. <3<3<3
ReplyDeletemaria
I absolutely believe that you and I are somehow connected lol because so many of your posts that I read, it is like reading my own thoughts!! This, what you described, is me!!!! Gosh I couldn't agree more with what you wrote; "But, somewhere along the way of always trying to keep the peace and not rock the boat I have lost the ability to stand up for my opinion at all!"
ReplyDeleteI hope you can find that healthy balance, I know I haven't yet! xoxo
Well said! Staying quiet is important, but so is standing up for yourself, or even just allowing yourself to have an opinion. I'm terrible at the balance. I keep quiet when I should speak up, and I speak up when I should keep my mouth closed. My filter isn't very reliable sometimes. : )
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