Jaxson's 4th Birthday!

I know, I know, we all say it, but seriously how is my baby growing up so fast?! In the blink of an eye my little guy has grown into such a little man! I have been so blessed in this life to have the opportunity to be momma to this sweet, sensitive, caring, smart and bossy little guy. He is such a little leader and go getter. Right now he loves to tell jokes and they are beginning to finally make sense and be funny! He loves Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Transformers, Iron Man and anything to do with sea animals.  He has such a love for reading and has an endless stream of questions constantly! At least we have moved beyond the "why" phase after I say everything. Don't worry, Kendra still has that one covered for me. ;) His favorite color is blue and his favorite food is probably spaghetti with green beans and cottage cheese. He goes back and forth between saying he wants to be a zookeeper at the San Diego Zoo and a fireman who works with Daddy.

He is a definite nurturer and always seem to be in tune to the feelings of the people around him, especially me. He is a bit more cautious then his sister when it comes to doing things he perceives as "scary" but he is not shy when it comes to meeting people and striking up conversations. He has made me so proud and I can not wait to see what this year holds for us!

So, with all that said we celebrated Jaxson's birthday with an under the sea family party last weekend (two days before his actual birthday).

 

Total momma fail since I took hardly any pictures at all! Oops.

The cake turned out so well and was really yummy!

On Tuesday he was VIP at preschool and brought a special treat for snack for all of his friends.

I spent the morning with him at preschool and afteward we headed to a nearby town with friends to go to Jump Zone, which is an indoor jump park complete with different bouncy houses and slides. It was so fun! We had some admission passes we had gotten at an auction and this was the perfect opportunity to use them. After the kids got sufficiently tired we went to an AMAZING ice cream place with all local home made ice cream. There were some interesting flavors, such as avocado, which was what Brandon had. It was surprisingly good! I had a dark chocolate orange chunk and I want to go back just for that. To.die.for!

After ice cream we headed to a local park to enjoy some warm weather!

Last night we celebrated with his friends at a local play area called Jungle Playland. We are still recovering from all of that fun! Pics of that to come later!

Friday's Letters

Dear bipolar weather- I am soo over you! Sunny one day and thunder storms the next. I am getting stir crazy being cooped up inside.

Dear Hair- You are finally going to get in for some much needed TLC. Cut and color here you come!

Dear Self - Snap out of this funk you have been in. Seriously! There is always so much to be thankful for. Remember to focus on that when things are tough.

Dear Kendra- You continue to challenge and amaze me all the time. The things you say crack me up. Where do you get this stuff?

Dear Jaxson- I can not believe that you will be four in four days! How did this happen?! I can not wait to celebrate you and all that you mean to me and have brought to my life.

Dear husband- I know you have been working so hard and doing so much for us. I am thankful, I may not always express it the best, or even say it as much as I should, but no matter what, I will always be thankful for the time you have spent on our family.

Dear weekend- Be good to me. That is my only request.

An apology of sorts

I want to apologize to you, my readers for my lack of posting, lately. I have been feeling so much lately and have so much I want and need to say and don't even know where to begin. Things are good, just a little heavy, if that even makes any sense.

I seemed to have taken an unplanned break from blogging and it has been just what I have needed. There are "things" I need to say and I will say, but do you ever get that feeling of being so overwhelmed with things that instead you just do not do anything at all? Guilty as charged right here. Sometimes I have zero motivation and instead of doing a little at a time, I just do nothing.

I guess that is kind of  how it has been with my blog lately. I have soo many words that instead of writing them all down.... I keep them all inside. But, something has been stirring within me lately and it has been telling me that it is okay to share some more of myself on this space. Deeper things and the not so pretty things that we all go through but choose to skim over at times.

I don't want to always (emphasis on the always) skim over these things. Sometimes it is okay to let people know that I feel defeated at the end of a day or that sometimes before the day has hardly begun that I am ready for it to be over already. It is okay to say that my husband and I have been fighting a lot....that marriage counseling may be on the horizon.  It is okay that somedays I feel like a complete and utter failure at being a mom. It is okay to let my guard down and let people in. I am by no means perfect and I do not pretend to be. I am a mess in some areas of my life and I will be the first to admit that. But, I fight like heck to get close to that perfection and there is no shame in that.

I guess what I am saying is that in order for you all to understand where I am coming from, I need to let you in a little bit more.

Spring Break ...by the numbers

Our Spring Break:

1 ER trip

1 fun filled Easter

3 really nice sunny days and 5 rainy ones!

4 birthdays celebrated!

1 trip to Perch and Play

1 trip to the park and beach

Never Have I ever.....

Okay, I know I have been a bit absent, as of late (doesn't that seem to be a theme, lately?) but I couldn't resist partaking in this link up because I loved this game! It was a frequent late night slumber party game in high school and then later, a late night drinking game. You know the one right, I say "never have I ever...... fill in the blank" and if you have then you take a drink.

So, let's get down to it!

Never have I ever.......been able to sit through the entire movie the Exorcist. I love scary movies, but this one bothers me.

Never have I ever........ drank gin without spitting it back out. Yuck. It tastes like pine needles.

Never have I ever.........been skydiving or scuba diving. No thank you!

Never have I ever........ sung karaoke in a bar, but I want to!

Never have I ever........ been to a blogger meet-up! Where are all of you pacific northwest bloggers?!

Never have I ever........not cried when watching Titanic, The Blindside and Up Close and Personal. Every.single.time!

Never have I ever....... washed my car myself. That's what the hubby is for, right? ;)

Never have I ever......changed a flat tire. That's what Les Schwab is for, right?

Never have I ever.......made homemade lasagna!   Hope to rectify that this month.

Never have I ever.......ran a marathon.

Never have I ever......been to a hockey game!



So, how many drinks would you have had to take?!

Kendra's First ER Trip :(

I have always known that Kendra was going to be the child who would most likely break a few bones throughout her childhood. She is adventurous, daring and has no fear. Not good qualities when you are 2 1/2 and don't know any better. I figured between her and Jax that she is going to be the child to keep me up at night worrying more.

Well, Friday morning we made our first trip to the ER with her. Not for any of the above reasons, though.

So, Friday morning she woke up whiny, but that has been a constant theme for her (she is 2 1/2, remember?!). She wouldn't eat but she had just woken up so I chalked it up to that. She perked up a bit, and was acting like her normal self. I figured the whining could just be attributed to the fact that I had to wake her up to get ready to take Jax to preschool.

We were almost to preschool when she started squirming in her seat and complaining about wanting out. Once again, all normal behavior. By the time we got to preschool she was crying. We walked Jaxson in and as he ran off to greet his friends I pulled her into my arms to talk to her. I felt her head and she didn't feel warm but she was shuddering. I set her down for a minute to tell the teacher something and when I turned around she had thrown up all over. :(  I helped her clean up and apologized. I didn't want everyone thinking I intentionally brought my sick daughter in and exposed everyone.

By this point all she wanted was to be held. We got in the car with the intention of going straight home.

She fell asleep which I considered a blessing, because she seemed exhausted. She got sick on the way home and I had to pull over and pull her out but it was too late.

When we got home she was shuddering and complaining about being cold. She came in the house and laid down on the floor and instantly was out. She kept kind of waking up and then going back to sleep. I let her rest for awhile, but was starting to feel uneasy. I took her temp and let me just say it was sky high! It must have peaked really quickly, because she was not warm at all just an hour before.  I gave her tylenol but she instantly threw it up.

I tried to wake her up and she just wouldn't really come to. She was responsive, but very lethargic. Her eyes were glassy and she wouldn't move. I didn't even hesitate, I just loaded her in the car. Normally, when my kids are sick I let it kind of play out and try not to over react. Because, there have so many times I was sure my kids were super sick and then I get to the doctor and they act perfectly fine and then I feel kinda silly. But, this was so different. I had never seen her like this before. The fact that she had a very high fever, couldn't stay awake and couldn't keep anything down and that it all happened in the matter of an hour, was enough to make me take her right in.

Her fever had gone done some by the time we got into the triage room, but she was still so lethargic and wouldn't talk or move. They got her settled in a room while we went through everything. They tried to give her Zofran which would dissolve under her tongue, but she wasn't having anything to do with it. She is like her momma, when she is sick she wants to be left alone and if she isn't she gets MAD. I had called Brandon to come to the ER, because I didn't want to be alone. He showed up as we were struggling to get her to take the meds. She took one look at daddy and started crying and held out her arms. He got her to take it right away. As soon as it took effect we were able to start meds for the fever.  In the meantime, they wanted a urine sample. That is difficult on a dehydrated not potty-trained child. They said they would have to use a catheter. I started crying. I had to step out of the room and leave Brandon with her. I knew I would lose it and make it worse on her but I felt horrible for not being there. Que the momma guilt x 100!

 

As soon as her fever broke she started to feel better. She sat up and even drank some water. She was still refusing juice and Popsicles and they were concerned about getting fluids in her. The doctor kind of laughed that she refused all the sweet stuff and just wanted plain water. 

They determined that she had a double ear infection (her first ever!) that had been brewing for some time but that she had shown no signs or symptoms until it got really bad. I honestly would have never known. She never complains of anything and hadn't shown any signs up until that morning. I felt so bad thinking that I somehow missed something and this whole thing could have been prevented. They said she probably has a very high pain tolerance and that her little body all of a sudden couldn't handle it when the fever got so high.

By the time we got home she was already acting so much better and by mid afternoon, the fever was gone she was no longer nauseous, she was eating and drinking and wanting to play.

It was such a scary morning and so strange that she went from fine to really sick to fine again all in the matter of five hours!