Wednesday, August 29, 2012
A Big Adjustment
I know I should be posting all my fun pics from my vacation, the wedding and miss Kendra's party but I don't have the energy right now. Quite honestly, I just want to let some of my feelings out right now...... I want just a few minutes and paragraphs to wallow in my self pity. ;)
Okay, I want to keep it real on here. If you knew me in "real life" than you would know that going back to work, even just part time, has been a much bigger adjustment for me than I had anticipated and for very different reasons than I expected.
Working with large groups of people brings all kinds of personalities into the mix. I know myself and that I have issues with self confidence. I just want to do a good job and come home to my family. All sorts of new feelings of inadequacy have resurfaced going back to work and it is hard to keep these feelings at bay. No one has made me feel this way, persay, but it can be hard not too.
I am also working a lot more hours than I originally intended to and I am hoping to get this cleared up soon. Between Brandon's and I's schedule we only seem to just cross paths. :( I know it is only temporary and that there are a lot of people out of work. I am grateful but just trying to be real. It has been a lot harder than I anticipated. It has made me realize that I did, in fact, take for granted all the time I had with my babies. I know they miss me and are having a hard time understanding and that is what makes this the most difficult. Excuse me for being such a downer. :(