Monday, January 28, 2013

How do You explain death to little ones?

We have experienced two deaths in two weeks in our family. On Friday evening Brandon's Great Grandma, who was 98, passed away.

She lived a full, wonderful life and was lucky enough to be surrounded by so much love! She lived at her home up until a few weeks ago. My kids were very close to her. How blessed were they that they got to know their great great grandma.

We decided that we would tell them that she had gone to heaven but try to gloss over the details. There are some things they just don't need to know at this age. However, I didn't want to lie to them, either. It can be a fine line and a tricky one. Kendra seemed to accept this (she really just doesn't get it) but Jaxson has asked ALOT of questions and they were questions I wasn't prepared to answer.

The hardest part about this is seeing that they don't quite grasp it. Their questions bring us to tears.
All I can keep telling him is that she went to heaven and that we will see her one day again. Jaxson is a thinker though, and he wants to know EVERYTHING. While I love and appreciate this about him, it has made it hard to explain the concept of death to him. I, of course, had hoped it would be much later in life when I had to. 

I hope I am saying the right things and doing the right things.

How do you or how have you explained death to little ones?


  1. Hey Ashley, I am so sorry you guys have had to deal with this just now, it can be very tricky and overwhelming having to explain 'life' to your kids at such an early age. They are resilient though and will bounce back, their questions are pure curiosity and will pass. I am sorry for your loss, what a wonderful 98 years she must have had!! Much love to you guys at this sad time xoxo

  2. My kids are about your kids' ages, and of course, baby girl accepts it just fine. But my sweet boy asks questions just like your Jaxson. We do the same thing, we are Christians, so we tell him that whomever passed away is in heaven and living with Jesus now and they are so lucky! We tell him its okay to be sad for ourselves here, but they are happy with God now. That seems to appease him for now....

    Good luck. Can definitely be a hard subject. And sorry for y'alls loss. Praying for ya!

  3. i am so so sorry for the losses in your family, ashley. i can only imagine how tough it is to answer jaxson's questions...trying to find the right words. brandon, you and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers. sending love and hoping peace washes over you all. <3<3<3

  4. I wondered this the other day...and I don't even know how I will explain that subject when it happens. Doesn't seem like it would be easy...sorry to hear about your family's losses.